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Monday, June 18, 2012

The Healing of a blind man

"Jesus Healing a Blind Man" by Del Parson
All my stitches in my eye are gone.  It has been a long 3 years, almost to the day, since I got a cornea-eating parasite.  It is now over.  I do not wish to aggrandize myself, for that is sin.  I wish, however, through the recounting of pages from my diary, to aggrandize the Lord and His mercy toward me during this long, hard ordeal.  Therefore, the following is all from my diary, dating from July 2009 until 18 June 2012:

15 July 2009 - Wednesday
Yesterday at around 4pm I was told I had Herpes Simplex, and given a prescription for Trifluridine ($128).  My cornea on my left eye swelled, and the eye drop is supposed to cure it.  I'm to take it every 2 hours, minus sleeping.  I go back to Dr. Plowthow Friday at 9:15am to find out how long I have to take it.

19 August 2009 - Wednesday
Around the 20th of July (Monday), Dr. Plowthow transferred me to a Dr. Meyers in north Provo by the Riverwoods Business complex.  He kept me on the drops (Viroptic and Zymar) for about two weeks, then realized that I had Acanthameba [sic], a parasite eating at my cornea, which could cause me to go blind if not fixed.  On Friday, August 7th, he sent me to the University of Utah's Moran Eeye [sic] Center to see Dr. Mifflin.  He had my eye numbed, and they [scraped] it 7 times with tiny spatulas to culture it and find a way to kill the parasite.  They mixed a drop called Chlorahexadine, which from August 8th-10th I was to take every house 24 hours a day.  I met with him on Monday August 10th and he told me to take Chlorahexadine every house whilst awake, and whenever I get up during the night.  I also took Zymar every hour during the week of the 10th of August.  Cyclopentolate was given to sooth the pain and help my sensitivity to light; taken every 8 hours, including during the morning.  Acyclovir was a pill given my Dr. Meyers that Dr. Mifflin wanted me to take 4 times a day.  He told me not to work that whole week, so I slept, medicated my Lortab, [a] pain-killer.  My wife has prayed for me a lot, and this has been a good thing for both of us.
I went back to Dr. Mifflin on the 17th, and he told me he was amazed of the improvement.  This was no doubt due to a family fast on Sunday the 16th for me.  The Chlorahexadine is hitting the cornea and killing the parasite, albeit slowly.  The Dr. Also said to take all other drugs 2 times a day except Chlorahexadine, - take that every hour still.
This has not been a very fun trial for me.  It has been very hard - a lot of intense prayers and scripture study.  Indeed I have found myself murmuring.  I have received revelation through blessings and the Spirit's voice telling me my eye will heal.  I have felt the Lord's almighty hand stretching me.  I admit that I have told Him I want it over with, and asked for more patience.  He has given me patience, and has unfolded the scriptures' meanings to me like never before, for which I am eternally grateful.
I know the Lord lives and answers prayers.  I know He will lead us along and instruct us if we are patient.  He will not forsake us if we trust in Him.  The Book of Mormon and Bible are true.  They do teach of His love and mercy.

27 September 2009 - Sunday
 . . . 2 weeks ago last Thursday I got prescribed PHMB and an anti-inflamatory steriod for my eye.  I use the steroid 3 times daily and PHMB every odd hour.  The drops kicked the diseases trash, but Friday, yesterday, and today the virus came back with a vengeance.  It brought with it light sensitivity.  I am trusting in God and learning patience.  I have been promised I will heal from this.  I know I will be, but it is hard to trust in the Lord's will now.  However, Joseph Smith said, "All difficulties . . . must be surmounted.  Though the soul be tried, the heart faint, and the hands hang down, we must not retrace our steps; there must be decision of character" (History of the Church, 4:570).  I read of the Savior's agony in Gethsemany [sic], but even He says, "Not my will, but Thine, be done" (Luke 22:42).  He will help me, and I will not back away!

1 October 2009 - Thursday
Went to the eye doctor again at 12:35pm.  We were there until around 4:30pm.  Met with Dr. Mifflin for about 1 1/2 hours.  He was afraid that a fungus was in my eye.  He told me to take Chlorahexadine and PHMB every hour; the red cap drop that dilates my eye twice a day; Neomycin drop every 4 hours; and then sent me to the UofU Moran Eye center to see Dr. Moshirfar, who has been on Americas Best Doctor's list the last 3 runnings.  Moshirfar OKed what Dr. Mifflin said, but also gave me an ointment to use every 4 hours (8, 12, 4, 8) called Brolene.  I have been told through blessings that I will be healed, but I must learn patience.  Joseph Smith, Junior taught that "God will feel after you, and He will take hold of you and wrench your very heart strings, and if you cannot stand it you will not be fit for an inheritance in the Celestial Kingdom of God" (John Taylor, Deseret News: Semi-Weekly, Aug. 21, 1883, 1).  Indeed He is feeling after me; . . . He is the Puppet Master working my strings until I am forced to bow to Him.  He is real, and I have personally covenanted with Him in the House of the Lord and elsewhere, that I will give my ALL for His Kingdom.  I will do whatever He commands, even if He decrees I must go blind, for I WILL ALWAYS SEE THROUGH THE LENSE OF OBEDIENCE!  I will never betray Him!
I go back to the doctor on Tuesday at 12:30pm at the U.  They will then tell what grew on the culture.

7 November 2009 - Saturday
Still have Acanthameaba Karatitis.  This Wednesday the medicine caused my eye to melt - basically for its skin to die very fast and fall halfway off and hang there.  It felt like there was something like dust in my eye.  We went to the UofU Hospital and Dr. Chang pulled it out and now it's healing. . . . I have neer seen clearer than I see now.  I hope God heals my eye before Christmas.  I must be obedient.

17 December 2009 - Thursday
About two days ago we received money in the mail.  We have been diligently paying tithing and wondering how we're going to make paying for car tags and drugs [for my eye] and stuff.  Then two days ago we received $600 in the mail from my parents.  Yesterday we took all the money we had and put of $1,200 in the bank.  It is a testimony to me of paying tithing.

31 January 2010 - Sunday
. . . The doctors say they think my acanthameaba is gone completely, but that there could be fungi still in my eye.  The healing of my eye can only be due to the Lord.  I must still continue to show obeisance to Him as thanks, and continue to live as He has taught.

20 August 2010 - Friday
Arose at 4:00am to get ready for my cornea transplant which started at 6:45am.  We couldn't find the Eccles Outpatient Building at the Intermountain Surgury [sic] Center at first, but called around and eventually found it.  The surgery only took an hour and fifteen minutes.  There was an aquarium there and a fish with a gimp eye like mine.
While I was being put under, the doctors said I spoke German to them.
I owe much to the Lord for this trial that I can never repay, whichi is kinda lame.  My faith in the power of prayer and that God answers prayer has grown.  I have cried out to God so many times, and He has heard my cry.  I have been so scared I would lose my eye, and my greatest desire is to have sight to be able to read scripture and teach the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  God has given me my sight back and increased by understanding of the scripture exponentially.  I know God lives and has a body because of what I have gone through - God could not help me unless He knew what it's like - and He only can come to that knowledge with a body.
I am taking Lortab for pain, and tomorrow get to start taking Vigamox and Pred Forte.
I am so grateful for Alicia and how she relies on the Lord.

26 August 2010 - Thursday
 . . . We meet with the doctor again at 1:10pm.  I need to be better at taking it easy on my left eye.  The Lord has healed it miraculously, and I hope it will continue to heal, but I must be obedient.
I addition to taking Vigamox and Predforte 4 times a day, I'm taking Combigan, an anti-biotic twice a day and preservative-free tears 8 times a day.

29 August 2010 - Sunday
 . . . I saw the doctor on Thursday.  I'm only taking Pred Forte 4 times a day and the artificial tears 8 times a day.  It has been stinging over the last few days, I assume from the stitches.  I hope it gets better.  It will get better. . . .
The Lord has been good to me and I am grateful to Him for it.  I need to be less impatient with His timing.  I know He hears my prayers.

12 September 2010 - Sunday
On Friday I withdrew from my German 3050 class because of orders from the doctor. . . .
I was reading a snippet from a talk Elder Maxwell gave at the May 1985 General Conference wherein he said, "The submissive soul will be led aright, enduring somethings well while being anziously engaged in setting other things right - all the time discerning the difference" (Ensign, May 1985, 71).  That got me thinking about the doctor's orders not to read much or play more than an hour of TV a day.  He actually said do none of those things.  How am I to submit to the Lord's command to read the scriptures every day?  I have decided to read five minutes a day then go back to bed.  I dont know how this is going to pan out.  The Lord will guide me.

1 October 2010 - Friday
Yesterday, 30 September, a Thursday, Alicia and I went to the doctor; before we went we prayed that all will be well with my stitches and that none would come loose.  The Lord answered our prayers.  No stitches were loose; my eye was healed well more than the doctors expected.  I no longer need to sleep with the eye patch and we don't need to see them for six weeks.

3 November 2010 - Wednesday
Yesterday I was reading the Book of Mormon in 1st Nephi wherein he has a vision of the Savior.  He speaks about John the Baptist saying "There is one among you who's shoe's latchet I am not worthy to unloose."  In my mind's eye I saw me kneel down and try to unloose His sandal, but I was stopped by the would in His feet.  I realized no one is worthy to take His shoe off because it causes us to bow in awe instead of fill His place!

19 June 2011 - Sunday
For the past half-week or so, my right eye has been red, bloodshot, like I've been sitting in front of the TV too long.  That usually goes away.  This redness, however, has not; my eye was like this (red and itchy) just before it was diagnosed with Acanthameaba Carititus.  Whether it is or not, I do not know.  This much I do know: if It is or not, God is at the helm and will steer rightly if I but keep His sayings.

21 June 2011 - Tuesday
Around 9am today we went to the Moran Eye Center in Salt Lake City to talk with the doctor.  We found out I have Epi Scleritus in my right eye.  The doctor gave me a prescription for Flourolanethaalene, a steroid drop, to be taken every 4 hours until the redness disappears; then decrease to 2-aday [sic] for 3 days, then for 1 drop a day for 3 days, then none.

7 July 2011 - Thursday
Today I saw Dr. Mifflin at 4pm.  My Eppi Scloritis is healed from my right eye.  I got one more stitch removed from my left eye, but before that my prescription was checked in my left eye.  The machine didn't totally focus, and I was again reminded taht I must constantly rely on the Great Physician for everything, but especially my sight.  God be praised.

16 July 2011 - Saturday
Alicia noticed today that my right eye is still red, evidently not fully healed from Eppi Scloritis.  I put two drops of Florolpretholene.  Tomorrow I will take them again four times throughout the day.  I hope it is not another parasite.  The Lord will help me as I am humble.

18 April 2012 - Wednesday
 . . . I went to the doctor on Monday and got one more stitch out; I now have 7 stitchnes in my eye.  The doctor said I can go swimming in Hawaii, and can drive now.

18 June 2012 - Monday
All the stitches (all 16) are gone.  The last 7 were taken out today.  Doctor Mifflin said i can go swimming when I go to Hawaii.  My next appointment is on Monday July 30th.  I will get prescried new lenses then; I am excited for new glasses.
I am always humbled beyond belief for the bounteous blessings the Lord has given me.  He has blessed my mom and my dad with wealth, because He knew Dad could hadle it, but also that he would need it.  The first sign of that was my, Dana's, and Russell's $250,000 hospital bill.  The Lord be praised for trying me in such a way as my eye infection and cornea transplant.  He knows i have passed, as I have told Him many a time I would give up my eyesight were it according to his will.  Fortunately, it was not.  He has seen fit to teach me and bestow upon me a display of His almighty power in the healing of my eye and in the miraculous improving of my eyesight in my left eye.  Indeed, it has gotten better, else the need for ew frames and lenses would not be.  God be praised for His marvelous blessings upon me through His Priesthood and His Church, which is only The Church of Jesus Christ of Later-day Saints.  I love the Savior Jesus Christ for this gift, which gift I do not deserve.  I have been a wicked man during this ordeal, even to murmuring against Him at times; nevertheless He has seen fit to heal me, so that I might see clearer both physically and spiritually.  My scriptural knowledge has grown beyond anything I've ever before known (including more than during my mission to California).  I owe Christ Ahman more than I ever can hope to repay.  I hope, however, he accepts my eternal gratitude.  he has done this great things for me; I do not deserve His blessing of awesome parents, Godlike Grandparents, and a Goddess of a wife who has been by my side through it all.  She has given of her time, talents, and love.  I praise God for the beautiful wife I have.
My prayer to Go is: Oh Thou great Ruler of the Universe, Thou who art mindful of the sparrow's fall, hast condescended to heal one of Thine unworthy children, for which goodness, oh Father, I am ever grateful.  Thou hast led me by Thy almighty and tender hand, and hast opened Thy word that I might sup from the cup of Thy wisdom.  Thy mercies are great unto me, oh Lord.  For the gift of restored sight I thank Thee, in the Name of Thy Holy Son Jesus Christ, amen.

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